I thought of happiness, how it is woven Out of the silence in the empty house each day And how it is not sudden and it is not given But is creation itself like the growth of a tree. No one has seen it happen, but inside the bark Another circle is growing in the expanding ring. No one has heard the root go deeper in the dark, But the tree is lifted by this inward work And its plumes shine, and its leaves are glittering.
So happiness is woven out of the peace of hours And strikes its roots deep in the house alone: The old chest in the corner, cool waxed floors, White curtains softly and continually blown As the free air moves quietly about the room; A shelf of books, a table, and the white-washed wall — These are the dear familiar gods of home, And here the work of faith can best be done, The growing tree is green and musical.
For what is happiness but growth in peace, The timeless sense of time when furniture Has stood a life’s span in a single place, And as the air moves, so the old dreams stir The shining leaves of present happiness? No one has heard thought or listened to a mind, But where people have lived in inwardness The air is charged with blessing and does bless; Windows look out on mountains and the walls are kind.
In this poem, May Sarton presents happiness not as something instant or effortless but as something that must be carefully nurtured overtime. The poem compares happiness to a growing tree, suggesting that it develops slowly, almost invisible, through patience and inner effort. It conveys us that rather than depending on external success or excitement, true happiness should be rooted within us and it should always be deeply personal.
Sarton’s words should echo in today’s society because as participants in the constant race of life, we often believe that true happiness comes from external validation rather than inner satisfaction.
The poem also emphasizes the value of solitude and simplicity. Sarton describes peaceful surroundings like “a quiet home”, “familiar objects” and “movements of stillness” as essentials to building a sense of contentment. Instead of viewing loneliness as something negative, she presents it as a space to grow through understanding your own self.
What this poem says challenges modern thinking where people often believe satisfaction comes from making life more complex. They see simplicity as “not enough.” Moments of quiet are mistaken for failure, loneliness is confused with depression and peaceful homes feel like being lost. But in truth, these simple, still spaces are where real contentment and self-understanding begin.
Don’t place your happiness in the hands of others. When it depends on them, it becomes fragile but when it comes from within, it becomes steady and truly yours!
Self-control isn’t just about “being strong.” Psychologists say it’s more about using smart strategies. Research shows that people who succeed at self-control don’t simply resist temptation; they avoid or reshape it. For example, instead of fighting distractions, they change their environment like removing temptations or distracting themselves when urges hit. Even in famous experiments like the “marshmallow test,” children who succeeded didn’t rely on willpower alone; they used simple tricks like looking away or keeping their hands busy.
So let’s look at some smart psychological tricks that make good choices easier.
1. Change Your Environment
Instead of depending on willpower, make your surroundings work for you. If distractions or temptations aren’t around, you won’t have to resist them.
For example, keeping your phone out of reach while studying or not buying junk food reduces the chances of giving in.
Good self-control often starts with smart setup.
2. Use Distraction
When you feel a strong urge, don’t fight it directly. Shift your attention. Do something else like going for a walk, listening to music or starting a quick task.
Cravings usually pass if you don’t focus on them, so distraction helps you “wait out” the temptation.
3. Build Small Habits
Self-control grows with practice. Start with small, manageable actions like following a routine, finishing daily tasks, or setting tiny goals. Over time, these build discipline naturally, making it easier to stay consistent without feeling overwhelmed.
4. Manage Your Willpower
Willpower isn’t unlimited. It gets tired. If you make too many decisions or resist too many things in a day, you’re more likely to give in later.
That’s why planning ahead, simplifying choices, and creating routines can help you save mental energy and stay in control.
Don’t just read and forget. Save this, write it down or keep it somewhere you’ll see it often. The more you remind yourself, the more naturally these habits will stick, helping you stay in control and make better choices every day.
For many Sri Lankan students, the Advanced Level (O/L) exams feel like the single most important moment in life. Weeks of late-night studying, endless past papers, and pressure from tuition teachers and family build up to a few hours in an exam hall. The tension is real. The stress is heavy. And the weight of expectations can feel crushing.
When the exams are over, a strange mix of relief and anxiety takes over. Some students celebrate immediately, while others replay every mistake in their minds. Even if you gave your best, you might feel unsure, insecure, or “not good enough.”
Here’s the truth: the pressure you feel is real but so is your potential. And the difference between feeling stuck and moving forward lies in perspective, mindset and action.
Your A/Ls Don’t Define Who You Are
It’s easy to assume that a set of exam marks determines your intelligence, your worth, or your future. In Sri Lanka, this idea is reinforced everywhere, from conversations at home to casual comments at school.
But the truth is, O/L results are just one measure of performance under exam conditions. They don’t capture your creativity, problem-solving skills, resilience, or ability to learn from mistakes. These qualities are what truly shape your future. Your potential is far bigger than any grade.
Pause Before Big Decisions
Immediately after A/Ls, many students feel rushed to make choices about foundation courses or career paths. The pressure to decide can be overwhelming.
Instead of acting impulsively, pause and reflect. Ask yourself:
Which subjects genuinely interest me?
What kind of career or lifestyle do I see for myself?
Which skills do I want to develop over the next few years?
This pause isn’t wasting time; it’s an investment in your potential. Thoughtful decisions now will create better opportunities later.
Build Skills That Go Beyond Marks
Even if your results weren’t perfect, your potential can be realized by building skills that grades can’t capture. Consider:
Improving English communication skills through writing, reading, and conversation
Learning digital skills like coding, graphic design, or social media management
Participating in clubs, volunteer work, or creative projects
Developing hobbies that enhance problem-solving and creativity
By investing in these skills, you’re creating opportunities that no exam score can measure.
It’s tempting to compare yourself to friends who excelled in A/Ls. But remember: everyone’s journey is different. Some students who struggled now thrive in university, business, or creative fields. Others who excelled may later discover their strengths lie elsewhere.
Focus on yourself. Take small, consistent actions to grow, learn, and improve. Your potential unfolds through effort, persistence, and smart decisions, not by waiting for external validation.
Remember: the students who move forward, even when they feel uncertain, are the ones who ultimately succeed.
You walk into a room and immediately feel smaller than everyone else. You scroll through social media and think, They’re ahead. I’m behind. You hesitate to speak because you’re scared someone might expose what you don’t know.
That quiet voice saying “You’re not good enough” can be exhausting.
And here’s the truth: even high-achieving students, graduates, and professionals struggle with this feeling. It doesn’t mean you lack ability. It often means you’ve tied your worth to comparison. Confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build, especially when you feel you don’t deserve it.
Here’s how to start.
1. Separate Your Worth from Your Performance
Many of us grew up believing our value equals our results, exam grades, university admissions, job titles. If you didn’t get into a “top” university, or if you’re still figuring things out while others seem settled, it can feel like proof that you’re behind. But performance changes. Worth doesn’t.
You can fail an exam and still be intelligent. You can struggle socially and still be capable and you can feel lost and still be worthy. Confidence begins when you stop treating mistakes as identity.
Instead of saying, “I failed. I’m useless”, shift to “I failed. I need a different strategy.”
That small mental change protects your self-belief.
2. Shrink the Comparison Circle
Comparison destroys confidence faster than failure. Scrolling LinkedIn and seeing someone your age working abroad. Watching a friend launch a startup. Hearing about someone getting engaged, promoted or migrating.
But you are comparing your behind-the-scenes to their highlight reel. Your journey is influenced by your environment, finances, opportunities, family expectations, and timing. No two starting points are the same.
Try this exercise: Compare yourself only to who you were 6 months ago.
Are you thinking differently?
Handling stress better?
Learning new skills?
Growth is quieter than success but it matters more.
3. Build Evidence, Not Affirmations
Telling yourself “I’m confident” rarely works when you don’t believe it. Confidence grows from evidence.
If you think “I’m bad at speaking,” create small proof that you’re improving:
Speak once in a meeting.
Record yourself explaining a topic.
Write one thoughtful LinkedIn post.
If you think “I’m not smart enough”, create proof:
Finish one online course.
Read one challenging book.
Learn one new skill.
Confidence is built from repeated small wins, not motivational quotes.
4. Stop Waiting to Feel Ready
Here’s something no one tells you: Confident people often feel nervous too. They just act anyway. If you wait to feel fully ready before applying for a job, speaking in class, or starting something new, you’ll wait forever.
Action creates confidence. Not the other way around. Apply even if you meet 70% of the qualifications. Speak even if your voice shakes. Start even if your plan isn’t perfect.
Each time you survive discomfort, your brain learns: “I can handle this.” That’s real confidence.
5. Change Your Inner Language
The way you talk to yourself shapes your identity. Notice your internal dialogue.
If you say:
“I always mess up.”
“I’m awkward.”
“I’m not leadership material.”
Your brain starts believing this repetition.
Instead, try realistic but empowering language like
“I’m still learning.”
“I handled that better than last time.”
“I can improve with practice.”
You don’t need extreme positivity. You need balanced self-talk.
6. Surround Yourself with Growth, Not Judgment
Some environments shrink you. If you’re constantly around people who mock mistakes, show off, or compete aggressively, your confidence will drop. Seek environments that encourage learning, whether it’s a supportive friend group, a professional circle, or even online communities focused on growth. Confidence grows where effort is respected.
7. Understand This: “Not Good Enough” Is a Feeling, Not a Fact
Feelings feel true but they aren’t always facts. You may feel behind, you may feel average and you may feel invisible. But feelings change with action, perspective, and experience.
Most people who look confident once felt deeply insecure. The difference is they kept moving.
Confidence is not loud, nor it is perfection. It’s the quiet belief that: “I may not be there yet but I am capable of getting better.” If you don’t feel good enough today, that doesn’t mean you won’t become strong tomorrow. You can always start small, collect proof and act before you feel ready because confidence is built, not discovered.
“We are building a country where no child becomes a victim of the drug menace”, stated the President.
President Anura Kumara Dissanayake delivered a powerful message during the Central Province launch of the “A Nation United” anti-drug campaign, emphasizing that this year will breathe life into the principle of equality before the law. He warned that when the rule of law collapses, it hands power to criminals, stifling national development and trapping citizens in poverty. This speech underscores a pivotal shift for Sri Lanka, blending anti-drug efforts with broader governance reforms.
The initiative, “A Nation United” rallies political leaders, tri-forces, police, and communities to eradicate drug networks through arrests, awareness drives, and rehabilitation programs. Key achievements include over 91,000 suspects apprehended, 1,818 held in long-term detention, and 1,566 individuals referred for rehab since its start. Notably, 62 police officers in Nuwara Eliya received commendations for their frontline efforts.
Educationally, this campaign teaches the ripple effects of drugs: they fuel street crime, breed corruption, and even infiltrate politics, eroding societal trust. By involving religious leaders, teachers, and parents, it promotes collective responsibility, showing young people that vigilance at home and school prevents addiction’s grip.
The President stressed that true equality means no one, regardless of status, escapes justice, a lesson drawn from past failures where impunity bred chaos. This principle isn’t just legal; it’s economic. A stable rule of law attracts investment, reduces crime-related costs, and empowers citizens to thrive. For students and educators, it’s a real-world civics lesson: strong institutions protect the vulnerable and pave the way for innovation.
Reflecting on recent crises like Cyclone Ditwah, which caused 4.1 billion US dollars in damage, the President highlighted funding reconstruction without new debt, a model of prudent governance. Future plans include a non-aligned foreign policy to safeguard sovereignty, a Rs. 330 billion public service salary increase for efficiency, and enhanced allowances for armed forces after 2027.
Do you ever feel like everyone else is moving ahead while you are somehow falling behind? Like the clock is ticking louder for you than for everyone else? Though this can come from career milestones, relationships, financial stability, academic achievements, or personal goals, the pressure to “be somewhere” by a certain age has quietly become one of the most stressful burdens of modern life.
If you feel like you are running out of time, you are not alone. But more importantly, you may not actually be behind.
The Illusion of the Timeline
From a young age, we are subtly handed a timeline. Graduate by this age. Get a stable job by that age. Be successful before 30. Build something impressive before 40. These expectations are rarely questioned, yet they shape how we measure our worth. Social media amplifies this pressure by constantly showcasing highlight reels of other people’s achievements, making it seem as though success has a universal deadline.
The problem is that life does not operate on a fixed schedule. Timelines are social constructs, not biological truths. People grow, succeed, fail, restart, and reinvent themselves at dramatically different stages of life. Comparing your chapter three to someone else’s chapter ten creates unnecessary anxiety.
Why the Feeling Feels So Real
The sensation of “running out of time” is often rooted in fear, fear of missed opportunities, fear of regret, fear of being judged, or fear of not reaching your potential. When we constantly think about what we have not done yet, our brain shifts into threat mode. This creates urgency, stress, and self-doubt.
Ironically, this mental pressure can slow progress. Instead of focusing on meaningful action, we become overwhelmed by the gap between where we are and where we think we should be. The more we panic about time, the less effectively we use it.
Productivity Is Not the Same as Purpose
Another reason this feeling persists is the confusion between busyness and progress. Being constantly busy can create the illusion that we are moving forward, but not all activity leads to growth. When we chase productivity without clarity, we exhaust ourselves while still feeling behind.
True progress begins when you define what actually matters to you. Are your goals genuinely yours, or are they shaped by external expectations? When your direction is aligned with your values, the pressure of time begins to lose its intensity.
You Are Not Late; You Are Learning
Every phase of life teaches something essential. Periods of uncertainty build resilience. Detours develop perspective. Slow seasons create clarity. What may feel like “lost time” often becomes foundational experience later.
Many successful individuals reached their breakthroughs later than society would consider ideal. Some changed careers in their 40s or 50s. Others discovered their purpose after years of confusion. Growth is rarely linear, and progress is rarely visible in real time.
Reclaim Your Sense of Time
Instead of asking, “Am I running out of time?” try asking, “What can I do with the time I have today?” Shifting from fear to intention changes everything.
Start by narrowing your focus. You do not need to fix your entire life this year. You need to move one meaningful step forward today. When you concentrate on small, consistent actions rather than distant outcomes, time begins to feel like an ally instead of an enemy.
Reduce comparison where possible. Curate your digital environment. Spend more time measuring yourself against your past version rather than someone else’s present highlight.
Most importantly, give yourself permission to grow at your own pace. Life is not a race with a universal finish line. It is a personal journey with different routes, speeds, and destinations.
Why do some couples survive explosive fights while others slowly fall apart? It’s not because they fight less. It’s not because they “found the perfect person” and it’s definitely not because they agree on everything.
According to world-renowned psychologist Dr. John Gottman, the real difference comes down to something surprisingly simple: How quickly they recover.
The Hidden Danger After an Argument
When couples argue, their bodies react as if they’re facing a real threat. Heart rate increases. Stress hormones flood the system. The nervous system shifts into fight-or-flight mode.
And the problem happens when the longer you stay in that heightened state, the harder it becomes to feel empathy, listen properly, solve problems and offer emotional repair. Your body starts treating your partner like the enemy, even if your heart knows they aren’t.
Gottman’s research found that couples who remained physiologically activated after conflict experienced steep drops in relationship satisfaction over time. It wasn’t the argument that destroyed them.
It was the lack of recovery.
The 20-Minute Reset That Changes Everything
The helpful part is couples who took just 20 minutes to calm their nervous system were able to return to the conversation regulated and emotionally available.
Twenty minutes of
Not ignoring the issue. Not suppressing feelings. Not walking away forever.
Just pausing long enough for the body to reset.
When your nervous system calms down, empathy becomes accessible again, you can actually hear what your partner is saying, repair becomes possible and connection can rebuild. So, instead of trying to win the argument, you protect the relationship.
With Valentine’s Day Around the Corner…
Everyone talks about flowers, gifts, and romantic dinners. But the healthiest relationships aren’t built on one perfect day.
They’re built on moments like choosing to pause, choosing to regulate and choosing to repair.
So instead of proving your point this Valentine’s, try proving your commitment and the next time an argument escalates, say: “Let’s take 20 minutes and come back to this.”
That one sentence might be more powerful than any grand gesture.
Love is not all about grand gestures and sweet talks. It’s about learning how to return to each other after fights and choose to repair what just got broken. The strongest couples aren’t the ones who never fight. They’re the ones who know how to reset.
A recent scientific claim suggests that Generation Z (typically defined as those born between 1997 and 2010) may be less intelligent than Millennials and earlier generations has ignited intense debate across social media, academic circles and newsrooms worldwide because of the long-held assumption that intelligence steadily increases over time and raises uncomfortable questions about the modern world now Gen Z is growing up in.
According to the neuroscientist, Dr. Jared Cooney Horvath, academical performance, intelligence test scores, problem-solving, reasoning, and concentration appear to be declining among younger generations. This apparently contradicts the so-called Flynn Effect, a phenomenon that showed IQ scores rising consistently throughout the 20th century. For the first time in decades, the data suggests that progress may be moving backward.
“They’re the first generation in modern history to score lower on standardized academic tests than the one before it,” Dr. Horvath said, pointing to over-reliance on technology as a key contributing factor.
“More than half of the time a teenager is awake, half of it is spent staring at a screen,” he said. “Humans are biologically programmed to learn from other humans and from deep study, not flipping through screens for bullet point summaries.”
Unlike Millennials, Gen Z has grown up entirely immersed in smartphones, social media, and short-form content. While critics often blame Gen Z for overly relying on technology, there is an important question that is frequently overlooked: Did Gen Z truly have the opportunity to grow up in a healthy and balanced environment or were they simply born into rapid technological change without meaningful guidance?
When the technology was new to Gen Z, it was widely promoted by scientists, developers and educators, preaching how it improved access to information and new ways of learning. Today, when technology is becoming extremely overwhelming, those who have been using it get heavily criticized over weakened attention spans, deep reading habits, and critical thinking skills.
While it is true that Gen Z has experienced the “side effects” of prolonged digital exposure, it is also important to acknowledge the broader context. Many young people have been pushed further into digital spaces partly because real-world environments have become increasingly stressful and demanding. For some, technology became a coping mechanism rather than a choice.
With digital overexposure at the center of the debate, Horvath also shared that Gen Zs are “overconfident about how smart they are” and that “the smarter the people think they are, the dumber they actually are.”
The scientists who support this claim express that they themselevs performed at higher cognitive levels when they were at Gen Z’s age. They have been blunt about how sad it is to have such lower IQ scores. This perspective invites a critical reflection: where was this concern when earlier generations upheld beliefs rooted in superstition, discrimination, sexism, misogyny, extremism, and systemic injustice? It is safe to say that many of those harmful ideologies continue to shape lives today.
It is evident that through technology or not, the younger generations started the trend of embracing scientific reasoning, empathy, and social awareness. While Gen Z is frequently labeled as “less intelligent or dumb” it is also the generation that has challenged injustice, questioned harmful norms, and stood together despite widespread backlash.
Technology has undoubtedly affected young people, often negatively, especially with the rapid rise of AI. However, rather than accusing the youth, should responsibility not lie with those had the authority, resources ad foresight to guide its use more effectively in the first place? If cognitive abilities and intelligence among older generations were indeed superior, why was there so little intervention when children were the first to being immersed in digital environments? Early guidance and mindful restrictions could have mitigated many of these challenges.
Labeling an entire generation as “less intelligent or dumb” is not only misleading but harmful. While older generations grappled with socio-cultural issues that they themselves invented, younger generations are fighting socio-economic inequality, pandemic-related disruptions, mental health challenges, and educational gaps; the debris of what cognitively capable generations had to offer.
What’s clear is that this debate goes far beyond test scores. It is true that these claims though being controversial do encourage society to confront how technology, education based on technology and lifestyle choices are influencing human intelligence and how progress should be measured differently in the 21st century.
But what is also true is, these claims should not diminish the progress younger generations have made in terms of humanity, empathy, emotional intelligence and social awareness. Harmful ideologies such as sexism and abusive behavior are heavily challenged by young people today rather than normalized. Even when such behaviors do appear, they are often learned patterns passed down across generations.
So, instead of asking whether Gen Z is less intelligent, perhaps the more important question is this: Did Gen Z create the system they are now being judged by and should intelligence be measured solely through standardized tests and IQ scores?
Rather than assigning blame, the focus should be on preparing young people to think deeply, critically and independently in a world deliberately designed to distract them.
For many students in Sri Lanka, getting into university is supposed to be the dream. Years of exams, pressure, sacrifices, all leading to one moment of success. But once the excitement fades, reality hits hard.
Behind the lecture halls and graduation photos, thousands of university students are quietly struggling, academically, financially, mentally, and emotionally. And most of the time, they feel like they’re the only ones going through it. They’re not.
The Pressure Nobody Warned You About
University life isn’t just about lectures and exams. It’s about surviving a system that often feels unprepared for the students it serves. Overcrowded classrooms. limited access to resources and outdated teaching methods. Many students want to learn but the environment makes it harder than it should be.
Financial Stress That Never Takes a Break
For students from low- and middle-income families, university life comes with constant worry. Rent. Transport. Food. Printing notes. Internet costs. Even state universities aren’t truly “free” anymore. Financial stress doesn’t just affect wallets, it affects concentration, confidence, and mental health.
“What Am I Even Doing This Degree For?”
One of the most common, yet rarely discussed struggles is uncertainty about the future. Many students enter degree programs without proper career guidance. Years later, they’re stuck asking:
Will this degree get me a job?
Am I wasting my time?
What skills do employers actually want?
The silence around these questions makes students feel lost and anxious.
Mental Health: The Quiet Crisis
Academic pressure, family expectations, social comparison, and financial struggles all pile up and with that comes: Anxiety. Burnout. Loneliness. Yet mental health support on campuses is often limited or students are too afraid to ask for help because “everyone else seems fine.”
Spoiler: they’re not.
The Truth No One Says Out Loud
Struggling at university doesn’t mean you’re weak. Feeling lost doesn’t mean you’re failing and being confused about your future doesn’t mean you’re behind. It means the system needs to do better and students need honest conversations, real guidance, and practical support.
Students deserve more than just degrees; they deserve clarity, confidence, and real-world readiness.
Imagine a child picking up a storybook and trying to swipe the page like it’s a smartphone screen. This moment actually reveals something real about how technology has shaped the way the youngest generation interacts with the world.
A recent survey of primary school teachers in the UK found that nearly one in three kids just starting school didn’t intuitively use a book the traditional way and some even reached out to tap or swipe paper pages as if they were digital screens.
Why Phones First and Books Second?
This is not just a silly misunderstanding. it reflects how deeply smartphones and tablets are woven into kids’ early lives. Many children today have grown up surrounded by touchscreens, voice assistants, and apps that respond instantly to every gesture. So it’s almost unsurprising that a curious preschooler might expect a book to “work” the same way.
The survey didn’t just look at book handling. It also showed that some children are arriving in school without what used to be considered basic “school-ready” skills like eating independently, drinking from a cup confidently, or using the toilet on their own.
Some early childhood research links heavy screen exposure at a very young age with delays in things like language, social interaction, and fine motor development, the kinds of skills you would normally build by interacting with books, puzzles, and peers.
Other studies have suggested that when children have more devices in the home, they actually read less by choice, especially in unrestricted screen environments.
This isn’t to say technology is inherently bad. Many parents and educators find digital tools valuable when used thoughtfully. But when screens become the default way to interact, children may sometimes miss out on the early physical and social learning experiences that books, play, and face-to-face conversation encourage.
Some schools are now experimenting with changes like phone-free classrooms or less emphasis on digital devices during early years so that children can develop focus, curiosity, and interpersonal skills without constant screen stimulation.
Parents, too, are encouraged to balance screen time with old-fashioned play, reading together, and letting kids explore the world with their hands and senses, not just their fingertips.
This isn’t just a funny story about kids and their gadgets. It’s a small snapshot of a larger cultural shift: Technology is reshaping childhood and that shift shows up in how kids learn to interact with even the simplest things like a book.
Whether we see it as adaptation, disruption or both, it’s worth paying attention to what kids are learning first and how that shapes how they see the world.
Acadora 